It won't be long now....

I talked to Mai today, and like the last conversation, she sounds great. I was a little concerned when I called and the lady that answered the phone asked her could she make it to the phone. Once she got to the phone she told me that a test they performed on her on Friday required a medication that has her 'unbalanced'. She told me she's walking with a walker but it helps to keep her balance. The test they performed required them retrieving fluid from her spinal cord, which she said doesn't hurt her today, but it sounds like a serious test. Sort of like when they give women epidurals, except they were extracting fluid for testing.

She sounds upbeat and determined to be outta there in the near future. She said she is going to give it about another week so they can get the test results. She also told me that they no longer believe she is depressed but she believes she may have had a breakdown. That sounds more like what happened, in my humble opinion. I think she just had too much going on at once between her home life, her job, and just not being happy with where she was in her life at that point that it took a toll on her emotionally.

In my heart, I know she will walk away from this experience with a new found attitude towards life and she will make it her business to look out for HER first, so she can find happiness.

Celebration of Love!

Today is my Parents' 42nd wedding anniversary and Daddy's birthday. Yes, he was vain enough to get married on his birthday. Because it's the middle of the week, Mike and I opted to celebrate with them on Sunday, since I'm off work. So, more than likely, we'll take them to dinner where ever they want to go and of course get them each a nice gift. I might be able to talk Mike into getting a small cake, but I'll settle for dessert at the restaurant; still trying to watch what I eat, somewhat, the big day is right around the corner.

Both of our parents represent something that isn't seen too often nowadays when it comes to marriage. When Momma Kay passed, her and Pops (my affectionate name for Mike's Dad) celebrated 51 years of marriage. Unfortunately, Pops was in the hospital on their anniversary so they didn't get to actually celebrate that day, but when he got home I'm sure the sparks flew! Between our parents that's almost a century of anniversaries! They have truly taught us what marriage is all about and we have them to thank for it. I can only pray that we will be blessed to have so many years together as well.

Meeting of the minds

I spoke to Mary yesterday and she tells me that she's meeting with Kelly on Thursday to go over the details of the bridal shower and the bacholerette party. It sounds like she is taking the initiative, or the lead I'll say, which doesn't surprise me. She'll let me know how things go and then we'll take from there.

Mary has a trip planned for the beginning of January, to a motorcycle convention in New Orleans. So if the meeting doesn't go as planned, she wants me to just go with her and celebrate then. It's a great idea, except for the fact that I can't spring a last minute trip on the other people I would like to attend. So I might have to turn down her offer; unless I go with her and then have a get together with the other girls when I get back?

We'll see what happens Thursday, and take it from there.

Party or Not?

It has come to my attention that there seems to be some problems with organizing a bridal shower and bacholerette party for me. Different bridesmaids are saying different things to Mike and it's starting to annoy me. You wanna know how I really feel? Listen, yes, I know that the only obligation of the bridal party is to buy the dress and be there wedding day. Who said that I don't know, but I understand it, not necessarily agree with but understand. It seems to me that being in a bridal party, may cost more than buying a dress. Period. Especially if things are discussed beforehand. They asked me what I wanted early on, I'm talking about over a year ago when the wedding was originally planned for Jamaica. I told them then I wanted a shower and b-party, you asked so I told.

After my sister dropped out of the wedding party and my MOH wound up in the hospital, one of the bridesmaids seemed to be taking the initiative. She asked me to email her the places I wanted to go. That was months ago, so obviously going anywhere out of the state or country is out of the question. Fine. Recently 2 of them asked for the list of who I wanted to invite. Okay, I put that together, now I'm hearing all these excuses. Why ask me then?

What this really boils down to is this: don't ask me what I want and act like you're planning it when it doesn't seem like much progress is being made. When I'm hearing that this one doesn't have the cash, that one has this obligation, another one is waiting for everyone else to call her and so on. Cool, I understand that you all have lives and my wedding is important to me, it should be. However, let me know straight up, so I can plan accordingly. No I'm not going to throw myself a shower. But I will set up something local where those who want to party with me can and those who don't won't. Simple as that.

This wedding thing is only a one time deal for me. I want to remember it as such. Without the drama and without the passing the buck.

Outbreak! Eeekk!

On the Knot, the Central Florida Board does siggy challenges weekly that I like to participate in for fun. The last challenge was about your wedding nightmare. I chose my nightmare as a trip and fall down the aisle. When it came time to vote for the best siggy, I voted for Vanessa, whose nightmare was a cold sore outbreak. How ironic? I am officially changing my nightmare from tripping and falling to having a hive outbreak, hands down.

I had to leave work early yesterday because I had an attack of the hives....again. What's funny is I had just left the allergists office earlier today, having my first consultation with yet another professional. I got to work that afternoon and after two hours in my shift, I began to itch uncontrollably. I couldn't stop scratching. I thought I was going to scratch my skin off because I kept scratching the same spots, over and over. Finally after about 30 minutes and 2 unsuccessful attempts at going back on the road, I called my Lieutenant and told him I had to go home. Before I left I took 2 Benadryls and prayed I'd get home before they knocked me out.

I scratched all the way home but I made it safely. I took a shower and then applied some anti-itch lotion I purchased from one of the many doctors I had seen in the past. The itching subsided for awhile, but I still took my 2nd dose of Benadryl before going to bed.

I woke up this morning not itching and ready to go to work later. My body had other plans; around 1pm I started itching. I hightailed it to CVS and purchased some more Benadryl. I also called the emergency number for my allergist and I even contemplated going to the ER. I know the hospital would only give me an IV of Benadryl, which would work, but again it's a temporary fix. The Dr. got back to me and told me take the Zyrtec on top of the Clarinex I had taken this morning. Also, I could take the Benadryl if needed. He mentioned a steroid, Prednisone, which I had taken before and had no interest in taking today. That would be a last resort. Seriously. So I called my Lieutenant and told him I wouldn't be making it in today. I hate to call out but this mysterious itching/hives mess drives me nuts and I would be no good at work.

So, I'm home for the day, popping antihistamines right and left. Hopefully, the blood work I did on Friday will give us some answers. I doubt it, been there done that, but I can at least hope right?

I've got them all....finally!

Our photographer, Nikki, sent the disc with our engagement photos on it and for some reason I could not load them on my desktop computer. So, I contacted Nikki to let her know and being the sweetheart she is, sent me a few prints as well as a new disc. Guess what? Still doesn't work. I decided to try it on my laptop and Voila! it works. So, now the dilemma is how do I get them on my desktop? Can you tell I'm not the most computer literate person you know?

So what I did was follow the wizard to publish the pictures to the web and then I used my desktop to access the page I created with the photos. Then I made a folder for the pictures on my desktop. Done. So here's a few of my favorites for your viewing pleasure:

I love how they turned out and I plan to use MyPublisher to make an album. One of the pics is going to be used in the sand ceremony frame and we need to use one for the signature mat at the wedding. Which ones do we use? Hmmmmm......decisions, decisions.

Added DIY project

I first saw the DIY monogram aisle runner on The Knot and immediately decided I would do one myself. Then I changed my mind, going for a more simple look. Once again, I have changed my mind and just placed my order for my aisle runner. I found an ivory floral lace runner on eBay for $13.95. It is 50 feet in length, as is the aisle I will be walking down. It also comes with the tape to secure it.

I went to Michaels today, and using my 50% off coupon and a 40% off coupon from AC Moore (they take competitors coupons) purchased the brushes and paint for my monogram. This is the monogram I am going to use:

My inspiration for the ceremony decor comes from Knottie Bridestarr, whose aisle was decorated like this:

I plan to have petals on the sides as well, either one or two colors mixed instead of separate like her photo. There will be a swag of tulle and the aisle will be closed off so guests will be seated from the outside. I can't wait until it comes in so I can get started. =)

Today was a good day....

Update on my MOH:

I just got off the phone with her and today she sounds great! We actually had a wonderful conversation. I hung up feeling a renewed sense of hope that she will be out of there sooner than later. I don't want to go all into our convo but trust me that she is on her way to starting over once she gets out. I'm so happy right now because she has come a long way. Like I usually tell her, I am there for her for whatever she needs that I can provide and I love her. I'll check with her later in the week and provide an update then.

In the meantime, I'm going to start dinner: Barbecue turkey wings, cabbage with smoked turkey and brown rice pilaf. Yummy.....Dessert will be Oreo cookies with milk. =) I know, I know I'm missing the soul food dessert but what can I say? I had a taste for some oreos and tomorrow I get back on my workout grind. Later.....

Honeymoon is booked!

I am so glad this is done! We are using our timeshare so I put in our request in March for Aruba. Mike had shot down Hawaii from the very beginning because he didn't want to do the long flight. So Aruba was suggested to us and seemed like a great choice. Problem is February is one of the peak months for travel, so our choices were limited; Aruba wasn't even available until yesterday. I started getting nervous because here we are with 5 months to the wedding and no honeymoon booked. Other availabilities included: Costa Del Sol, Spain, Argentina, and Mexico (North Baja), and Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic. Spain would be chilly in February and since we wanted beach weather, that one was out. The resort in Mexico looked so-so, but not honeymoon worthy. Lastly, the resort in Dominican Republic, the Sun Village Resort and Spa looked amazing and gets rave reviews on http://www.tripadvisor.com/ but we went to Punta Cana, DR a few years ago, and couldn't stand the nasty attitudes of some of the people or the resort where we stayed, the Barcelo Bavaro Palace. Ugh, stay away from this place. So, our opinion of the DR was somewhat tainted by that experience, which made me hesitant to book Puerto Plata. The good thing is I didn't have to make a choice; Aruba it is! As a bonus, Mike agreed to go to Hawaii for our 1st year anniversary since he knows that's where I really wanted to go. Every since I was a child, I always wanted to go to Hawaii, so that's our compromise. Works for me. These first two pictures are of the beautiful beach across from the resort where we'll be staying, La Cabana Beach and Racquet Club, and the outdoor massage spot at the Manchebo Beach's Spa Del Sol. Can't wait for the couples' massage!



Madame Janettes is a restaurant I keep reading about that everyone who goes to Aruba adores. This is a picture of the surf and turf dinner that I will most definitely order. Yummy...Here's a picture of the resort in the background and the pool.
Another shot of the beautiful pool at the resort. The other photo is the new natural bridge, which I hear is a must see in Aruba. The original bridge collapsed.

This should be an amazing honeymoon and I am so looking forward to it. =)

New Photographer Website and other news!

I know I posted a link to my engagement photos and my photographers' website, but it has since changed. I'll add the e-pics when I get a sec but the new website is www.nikkirosa.com
One of my photos is on her site under photographs, then to be weds, or something like that. Just thought I'd update that ;-)

Mike wants to check out a store in our area, Jims Formalwear, for his suit since he took soooo long to go to Men's Warehouse........

BREAKING NEWS!!!!

I just got a call from the timeshare company that a unit is open in Aruba!!! Yay!!! I have been patiently waiting since March for something to open up. I have to research this resort and if all is good we will be honeymooning in Aruba baby!

Now back to what I was saying, the suits at Men's Warehouse are all sold out since Mike procrastinated so much. So I'm on my way out the door to check out another store. Update later.

Three's a company

On June 7, 2008, or as us brides knew the day, 06/07/08, Mike lost his mother. She had been in the hospital for 9 weeks prior to the Lord calling her home. Of course this was and still is a very devastating experience, especially when you don't expect it, and let's face it, no one is ever prepared for something like this.

I still remember how happy we all were at their 50th wedding anniversary party that we threw for them in our home February 2007. Who knew a year and a half later we'd be here? Life is funny like that.

Well, Pops, as I call him, Mike's dad and my future-father-in-law, now resides with us. He decided he no longer wanted to live in the home he shared with his wife, too many memories he says. Can't say I blame him. I enjoy his company and Mike's other siblings call often to check on him. Last night we stayed up until 3am after I got off work, talking and watching something on TV about the old country westerns actors. I still look at him sometimes and my heart hurts because I see how much he misses her. Like he told me last night, it hurts to lose your parent, but your spouse is a whole 'nother thing. I can feel him on that. Just keep praying for us all.

"Rescue Me"

I arrived at the hospital yesterday at exactly 1pm and gave the admission desk Mai's full name for visitation. He asked for the security code then told me that visiting hours were over, but he'd send me back there anyway to see if they would let us in. I mistakenly thought visitation was from 12:30-1:30 pm. We made it to the area and spoke with the intake nurse who told us the same thing, visitation was over. She then asked, "Where are you from?" I told her New Jersey and she seemed to think it warranted at least a try to the charge nurse, since we traveled so far. Lucky for us, the charge nurse must've agreed and they let us in. We couldn't take cell phones, pocketbooks, food, basically nothing. I was warned of this prior to coming so I just left my purse in the car and Mike didn't have anything with him anyway.

The first receptionist unlocks a door and directs us where we need to walk, to another door where someone will open that door for us also. As I walk down this long blank hallway, I am filled with anticipation of what my girl is going to look like, will she know who I am, and how she will act. I get to the end of the hallway and am somewhat confused, no one comes out to us and we are facing three different doors. This wasn't mentioned by the receptionist. A few minutes goes by and fresh faced young lady opens the door to our right and leads us in. We follow only to see a community room with a table in the middle of the floor facing a caged in television. The lady points to a door where Mai is.

I walk in her room. She says, "Hey". I say, "Hey" back. Brief pause. We embrace and she leads me out to the community room. We sit and talk for a good while. She is talking sensibly and knows what's going on. She tells me they don't know what's wrong with her, what her diagnosis is, how long she will be there, nothing. Then she tells me, she wants to go home. Dreams about foods she'll eat when she gets out. My eyes start to well and I fight back tears. She continues but I can tell whatever meds they have her on, are no good. Her pupils are dancing before my eyes, right, left, right left. She can't focus on me. Her balance is off, like her equilibrium is off. What are they doing to my dear friend? Now I'm getting pissed, but I hold back. She tells me again, I want out of here. But I can't do anything about it. Only family can get her out. If they want to.

We talk for a a little more, but then her food comes and her attention is diverted. After I watch her movements and talk a little more I tell her it's time for us to hit the road home. We have a road trip ahead of us, plus we left Mike's father in the lobby waiting for us. He went to see some of the nice folks on the hospital floor Mike's mom was on, not too long ago, before we lost her in June. So we both hug Mai, I tell her I love her and will do what I can. I tell her to get well and get the hell out of that place asap. I try to lighten the mood and tell her she has a dress to buy and a wedding to attend. She replies, "Oh, I'll be outta here, wayyyy before then". I just smile, fighting back tears and thinking to myself, I hope so. I really do.

We walk out and as soon as she's out of sight, I let it out. Mike holds me while I cry on his shoulder. This is jacked up, I say. I can't protect her. I can't do a thing for her in here. You see, years ago, I was the one who would rescue Mai. She was always a mild mannered quiet type, who didn't like confrontation and surely didn't want to fight. I would step in when someone bothered her; sort of like her protector. I had no problem putting my fist to someones face if they bothered her because she didn't bother anyone. Now I can't protect her or rescue her from this crazy place she's in. I'm pissed.

Don't take it personal

I arrived in North Carolina early Friday morning Sep 12, after driving all night and working 8 hours. Around 12 noon, I decided to call my MOH to see how she was doing and if I could come and see her. The first woman that answered the phone asked my name, which they never did before, and then put me on hold. After a few minutes another lady comes on the line, asks me my name, then says Mai isn't taking any calls. I quickly asked her to tell Mai who was on the phone and that I was in town and wanting to come see her. After all, Mai would LOVE to see me, right? The lady returns to the phone after a few minutes only to tell me I should try back later. What? Fine. I hang up. Confused, I don't know what to feel.

The next visiting hours are after 5pm so after I take a quick nap I call back at exactly 5pm. After two transfers I'm told Mai isn't taking any calls. Okay. Again, I hang up, confused. Angry. Not at Mai, but at the situation. It stinks.

I decide to call Mai's sister, Jo, so I can let her know about this latest convo, or lack of it. Jo assures me what I came to realize prior to calling her: Don't take it personal, she loves and would love to see you. It's them (the hospital staff) that insist she doesn't want to be bothered. I feel in my heart that this may not be the case, but I decide I am marching straight up to the hospital before I head hundreds of miles home. Empty and without a visit.

I've got the MOH blues

Well, I called my MOH (Maid of Honor) today to see how she was doing and it wasn't a great conversation. For the entire 13 minute conversation I kept asking questions to spark conversation, but she'd only give me one word answers, if she answered at all.

You see, my MOH has been in a hospital, the mental ward nonetheless, since July 15, my 30th birthday. Apparently, she had too much on her financial and emotional plate to handle. It's amazing to talk to someone one day and all is well and then the next she sounds like a totally different person.

I still call her my MOH because that's what she is even though reality is telling me everyday that I'll be lucky if she can even ATTEND the wedding, let alone stand next to me. I just pray for her to get out of that damn hospital and back to her life. I miss her and I love her. I just called her sister to get any updates she might have that I don't know about, but I have a feeling she is just wasting time and withering away, physically and mentally, in that hospital.

Coupon mania=wedding purchases

This weekend I decided to knock out some shopping for a few wedding related items. Armed with a multitude of coupons and my shopping sidekick girlfriend, Latoya, we made our way to the first stop on the list, Kohls. I was actually browsing for my wedding day jewelry when I decided to check out their frames to see if they sold the Ether Umbra Frame that I could use for the sand ceremony. Amazingly they had the frames, 3 of them actually, and on sale for $14.99! Needless to say, this was a checkmark off the list.

Next stop was the mall where we went to Macys to find the jewelry. I had in my mind the type of look I was going for; chandelier earrings with a beautiful bracelet and possibly a simple necklace to match. Not just typical chandelier earrings, I wanted a bronze colored antique look also. I found my sparkly gems at Macys but I found a better selection of bracelets at Boscovs. Jewelry, check.

On Sunday, we hit the road again, this time to head back to the Linens n Things store we scoped out the day before (unfortunately, we left our coupons home on Saturday and refused to purchase without taking advantage of a little savings). At LNT, I purchased cocktail table candles which I plan to sit atop a small pile of sand. Cute, and they only cost me $3.00 each. Good find in my opinion.

AC Moore takes Michaels coupons so I decided to look for a signature mat that I could get 40% off the price. Lucky for me, they had a beautiful cherry wood frame I got for $17 and I just added another mat to it to give me more signing room. I also bought pink and brown pins for the guests to sign the mat and some decorations for the treasure chest card box we'll have at the reception.

Ultimately, this was a productive and cost effective wedding related weekend!