Another battle lost.....

We had a good time last night at Mike's annual holiday party. We didn't get back to our room until 3 this morning. I couldn't fall right asleep so I stayed up about an hour watching deal or no deal. Probably about 9:30 am Mike jumped up and found his phone on the floor. It vibrated it's way to the floor after he failed to pick it up when it was going off. He looked at it and realized his cousin Michele had called him at 4:30 am. We were dead to the world at the time. But knowing that hour, my heart sank knowing the call had to be bad about Jr. As he calls Michele back, I have my face buried in the pillow, bracing myself for the words I know are going to come out of his mouth. I also said a silent prayer. Then I heard it. He's gone.

We jump up, call Shaq, shower and get dressed as fast as we can so we can get to the hospital before they take his body downstairs. Michele told them she would wait for us and they did.

At the hospital, the same hospital where Mikes' best man (Shaq) lost his mom a little over 4 weeks ago, I'm dreading entering the room. We're all there; Mike, his best man who was best friends with Jr. (Jr. was Shaq's best man Oct. '07), Toya (Shaq's wife) Michele and her husband Kurt, Keith, Aunt Helen and Uncle Charles, Kevin and his girlfriend, Carl (Jr.'s roommate), and a few of Carls' friends. The four of us enter the room and the first thing I notice is the silence. The machines are all gone; no beeping, just silence. I look at Jr. and he looks so peaceful. Like he's sleeping. With tear filled eyes I stand there, honestly questioning my faith and beliefs in God, or Allah as I've known him for many years. I put that to the side for now, walk over to get closer to Jr. I touch his face, his hair and then kiss him goodbye on his forehead. After standing in the room a little longer I walk out and just remember him the last time I saw him up and about. Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving Jr. came to our house with one of his famous sweet potato pies. Oh my god that pie was good. I hid it from everyone else so they wouldn't get a piece. LOL. I know it's selfish but I couldn't help myself. That man could cook and his pies were amazing. What's funny is the last time I was at the hospital, about a week ago, I told him I wanted another pie so he had to get out of the hospital. I told him how I hid the pie and he just laughed. That smile I won't forget and am glad I was able to put it there the last time I saw him alive.

Mike is holding up pretty good. The family meets with the funeral director tomorrow so we'll probably plan to have the services on Saturday to give out of state fam a chance to get here.

I'm going to miss Jr. I still have his boxed wedding invitation in my car that I never got to give to him. I'm going to pray for understanding because I need it. Pray for us, please. It's been a rough year for this family.